Sometimes we just have to laugh at scary things. The recent story of the CIA employee breaking into homes and stealing is one of those stories.
It really should be scary as hell. Now I’m not one of those namby pamby twits that thinks the CIA should have a bunch of Altar boys spying on behalf of out country. In fact, I know we need good people to do some very distasteful things in order to ensure our safety and my general feelings are best summed up in George Orwell’s quote that "People sleep peaceably in their beds at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf." But, CIA employee George Dalmas III is something else entirely.
This guy is accused of a string of home burglaries during which he allegedly stole thousands of dollars worth of antiques, jewelry and coins. Not only that, but they also found he may have taken about a thousand pairs of women’s panties. Some of the homes he is thought to have burglarized belonged to other CIA employees. What a fruitcake! This guy is straight out of one of Elmore Leonard’s crime novels or a freaking Mel Brooks movie.
Viewed from an Elmore Leonard type of perspective it actually is kind of funny. Can you just imagine this lunatic gleefully passing through the metal detectors and security screening at the CIA’s Langley compound wearing the spoils of one of his clandestine panty raids? Perhaps a pink lacey thong from Victoria’s Secret or Frederick’s of Hollywood under his non-descript suit? I’d sure like to know if old George was one of the CIA people at the Abu Ghraib prison when it was decided it would be a swell idea to have Iraqi prisons be pranced around naked with panties on their heads. Oh man…if the fate of the free world rests on this guy’s shoulders we are all screwed.
Somehow this is not the type of thing I was considering when they passed the Patriot Act and authorized surreptitious searches of homes. I can hardly wait to hear this guy’s defense when and if it ever goes to trial…hearing his attorney trying to prove a link between Al Qaeda and Frederick’s of Hollywood is gonna be hilarious!
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